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Shitty Trail

(To the tune of “The Mickey Mouse Club”)

S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L

Shitty trail (It sucked!).

Shitty trail (really fucked!).

The motherfuckers laid a shitty trail (shitty trail!)

I would rather drink a beer,

Than hash your shitty trail.

S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L

Drink it down, down, down…

We've Got Virgins

(To the tune of "Frere Jacques")

We've got virgins,

We've got virgins,

At our hash,

At our hash,

Gonna get'em drunked up,

Gonna get'em fucked up,

Down the hatch,

Up the ass

Drink it down, down, down . . .

Hashers, Meet The Hashers

(To the tune of “Meet The Flinstones”)

Hashers, meet the hashers,

We're the biggest drunks in history,

From the town of Greenville,

We're the leaders in debauchery.

Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years,

Watch us as we drink a lot of beers,

Down down

Down down down down

Down down down down down down down down

Down down down down down

Down down down down down down

Soldier Song

Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be,
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee,
For cunt, for cunt, for country and for queen,
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be!

Chicago

(To the tune of "The Bear Went over the Mountain")

I used to work in Chicago,
In a department store,
I used to work in Chicago,
I don’t work there any more!

​

  • A lady came in for some nails,
    Nails she wanted, 
    Screwed she got!

​

  • A man came in for a balloon,
    A balloon he wanted,
    Blown he got!

​

  • A man came in for a lollipop,
    A sucker he wanted,
    Sucked off he got!

​

  • A lady came in for drain cleaner,
    Drano she wanted,
    Clean pipes she got!

​

  • A lady came in for a pony,
    A horse she wanted,
    Ridden she got!

​

  • A man came in for some wheels, 
    Wheels he wanted, 

        Rimmed he got

​

  • A woman came in for a doughnut,
    Glazed she wanted,
    Creme-filled she got!

​

  • A lady came in for a throw rug,
    Rug she wanted,
    Rug-burned she got!

​

  • A lady came in for a felt hat,
    A felt hat she wanted,
    Felt up she got!

​

  • A woman came in for a brass tub,
    A brass tub she wanted,
    A golden shower she got!

True Blue

TO (HasherName)

Here's to _____

He's true blue,

He's a Hasher,

Through and through,

He's a pisspot,

So they say,

Tried to go to heaven,

But he went the other way,

Drinking down, down, down, down, Down, down, down, down, Down, down, down, down, Down, down, down, down. (Continue until down down is finished, or go into "Why are we waiting".

SING US A SONG, YOU WANKERS!

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